I met my partner when I was 31, and we fell head over heels. We both knew we wanted kids and it’s strange, because although I had been diagnosed with stage 4 endometriosis, I was somewhat relaxed about having kids. A part of me suspected we could have trouble because of my history with this, but on the other hand I thought I had plenty of time. You read about celebrities having babies in their 40’s or later so I thought that when I was ready, we would pop a few kids out and life would be grand! How wrong we were!
It took six long and difficult years before we finally had a baby. We are lucky to have had a successful pregnancy at all, the odds were incredibly low for me. I had spent years at a range of clinics and had three rounds of unsuccessful IVF. The first round we managed to gather a couple of viable embryos, but none of these implanted successfully. The second and third round of IVF resulted in no viable embryos. Because I wasn’t diagnosed with endometriosis for so many years I had extensive lesions in my uterus, which was identified as a rare condition called Asherman Syndrome. I had ovarian cysts removed, but because endometriosis can reoccur, further cysts and adhesions can sometimes develop again after surgery. It was a perpetuating cycle and my uterus wasn’t optimal for getting pregnant. It got the point that we had no further options and were told to consider surrogacy.
Looking back on all those years of trying to conceive, it truly took me to the edge of my sanity. The pressure was so intense. Thankfully I had good support from friends and family but it’s hard to truly share your journey with those who aren’t going through it. I reached out to Fertility New Zealand to get support and joined their regular meetup events which allowed me to meet many courageous woman on the fertility journey. I’ve made some really good lifelong friends through that process and it was really valuable for me.
During these years of trying to get pregnant, I had approached Guy Gudex at Repromed for a second opinion before I was his patient. No one else had any other options for me, they had exhausted all of their methods and treatments and surrogacy was the next step. I reached out to Guy at this point, to see if he had any ideas and surprisingly, he was really positive about my situation and had an amazing attitude. He installed a lot of hope in us that maybe, just maybe, we could have success?
I’m so thankful we took another chance and acted on that tiny little maybe, and that we had Guy on our team. Our odds were still low, I had adhesions and damage to my uterus, but we were willing to give it another crack. So, with nervous trepidation, and Guy and his team cheerleading on the sidelines, we undertook a final round of IVF with Repromed. We were so surprised to have a successful embryo and implantation! Two weeks later, we got the positive pregnancy result and we were over the moon! We truly couldn’t believe we finally had a pregnancy! But we were also pretty cautious as my uterus hadn’t been happy for many years, and we were realistic about that.
Thankfully the pregnancy continued to go well, and it was a really enjoyable time for me and now we have a little girl! It is just incredible becoming a Mum to my little girl after all of these years waiting for her to join us. Even in the thick of sleep deprivation and dirty nappies, we are so grateful and just feel incredibly blessed.
We still have one embryo, frozen, and at some stage soon we would love to try and have another baby. But because of complications, I am unable to undergo another pregnancy so we are starting to think about how we can find a surrogate to carry our embryo for us. In life, I think there is always something that is going to test you, and for us having kids is our challenge. But it’s made us even stronger than ever and we are determined to stay strong.
To anyone who has been told “You can’t have kids”, don’t automatically believe what you’re told. Keep on seeking answers and options and keep the hope alive. It isn’t called a miracle of life for no reason! We kind of viewed it as a ‘no stone uncovered mission’ until every single option has been undertaken. I can’t even explain how glad I am that we didn’t give up.
Repromed provides fertility treatment with heart. Based in Auckland, both public and private treatment is available and all are welcome. You can book a 15 minute phone consultation with a fertility doctor free of charge. Email or call 0800 483 105 to book.
Individual results may vary dependent on your personal circumstances.
With thanks to our generous client for sharing her personal story.